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I have a new favorite shirt! The moment I saw it online, I knew it was meant for me: “All Feelings Are Okay.” This powerful message has become one of my mantras, especially in my work with preschool students. Together, we explore various emotions, digging into what happens when we experience these feelings. Among them, anger is often labeled as a “bad” emotion, but in truth, it’s a sentiment that everyone feels. The challenge lies not in the feeling itself but in our actions.
As a child, I put my anger into action in unhealthy ways. Being the oldest of three sisters, I enjoyed the undivided attention of my parents for a mere 14 months before gaining the title of Big Sister. As the oldest, I craved control, wanted to be first, and found myself striving to get the best of everything. When my expectations were unmet, rage would consume me. Looking back, there are moments I’m not proud of – breaking a window, playing a reckless game of “crack the whip” at the roller rink, which once ended with my sister suffering a broken arm. As an adult, I’ve learned the importance of pausing before acting on intense feelings of anger.
Ephesians 4:26
“In your anger do not sin” :
Do not let the sun go down
while you are still angry...
I’ve had the opportunity to witness a co-worker navigate the depths of grief after the loss of her son. In her sorrow, she discovered a meaningful lesson – the ability to acknowledge and feel her emotions and then gently release them. This, too, involves a pause in response to the emotion rather than immediate action.
When helping a preschool student work through their intense emotions, we also use the power of the pause. This momentary stillness allows our bodies to regain balance, enabling us to make better choices in our actions. Being honest, sometimes the pause comes after a release of strong emotions. The key is learning to pause before taking action. It’s crucial to acknowledge and process these emotions before acting. One technique we use in the preschool room is the simple yet effective practice of deep breathing.
Reflecting on these experiences, I am reminded of the wisdom found in Ephesians 4:26 “In your anger do not sin.” I can feel my anger, pause, even take a few deep breaths to calm myself, and release my feelings to make a better action.
Psalm 62 offers an exploration of emotions directed towards God. It concludes with an acknowledgment of who God is and also highlights our actions.
Psalm 62:11-12
“One thing God has spoken,
two things I have heard:
Power belongs to you,
God, and with you, Lord,
is unfailing love”; and,
“You reward everyone
according to what they have done.”
This week, read through Psalm 62. When those intense emotions hit, take a pause and go to God. Remember, All Feelings are Okay.